Child of Hardship

In the dead of night, before the roosters had even crowed, Sang Sang quietly rose from bed. She put on a slightly oversized maid's outfit, slipped into her worn cotton shoes, and pushed open the door to the courtyard well.

She swept away the snow accumulated on the well curb, began drawing water to fill the jars in the kitchen, then neatly stacked the firewood, split the day before yesterday, in the corner. After that, she took a broom to the front shop, swept the floor clean, wiped down the tables and chairs, rearranged the messy brushes, ink, paper, and inkstones, then squatted by the door, meticulously checking for any oversights.

These were her usual daily chores, but today she performed them with unusual focus and meticulousness. When everything was done, the eastern sky was already faintly showing the first rays of dawn. She squinted at the sky, stepped out of the Old Brush Shop, and went to the alley entrance to buy two bowls of sour and spicy noodle soup.

Sitting at the table, she quietly finished her bowl of noodles, washed the bowl clean, then returned to her room to tidy her clothes. She took out the box from under the bed, divided the thick stack of silver notes inside into two equal parts, then tucked the portion she believed belonged to her into her bosom.

She walked to the bed, looking at Ning Que who was still sound asleep. Her delicate eyebrows slightly furrowed, she remained in that posture, staring at him intently for a long time, then shouldered her luggage and left, without the slightest hesitation.

The door of the Old Brush Shop opened.
The door of the Old Brush Shop closed.

Thanks to her having repaired it a few days prior, the door made no sound, disturbing no one. She carried her luggage, silently departing, her small figure vanishing into the twilight merging with the dawn in Lin Si Shi Qi Alley, as if she had never been there.

...

The Grand Academician's Estate was exceptionally quiet in the morning sun, its large dark gate tightly shut. The servant sweeping the courtyard outside deliberately restrained the sound of the broom scraping against the ground; the ancient winter trees within the estate stood motionless.

Sang Sang, carrying her luggage, arrived at the gate of the estate, exchanged a few words with the servant who looked wary, then ignored him, frowning as she approached and knocked on the door. Perhaps due to her foul mood, her small fist contained extraordinary strength, pounding on the thick, heavy door with dull thuds like heroic war drums.

The drum-like knocking immediately startled everyone in the estate. Behind the door, muffled shouts and annoyed inquiries could be heard. The sweeping servant was scared witless, rushing to chase away this little girl who appeared from nowhere, but just then, the door opened.

"Second Steward, this little girl is too bold." The servant whimpered.

The Second Steward, still sleepy, rubbed his eyes, looking at the small maid before him with displeasure, intending to wave her away. But then he suddenly found her very familiar, rubbed his eyes and looked closely again, only then remembering the stir in the estate over the past few days.

"You... you... you are... Xiao... Xiao..."

...

Having woken up in a hurry, Grand Academician Zeng Jing and his wife were both in casual clothes, not yet having washed their faces, their hair slightly disheveled. Looking at the little girl standing silently before them, their minds were utterly bewildered.

Sang Sang clutched the strap of her luggage on her shoulder, looking down at her small shoes peeking out from under her skirt hem, and said, "That day, you two said I was your daughter?"

Madam Zeng Jing nodded repeatedly, her face filled with joy and surprise. If not for the Grand Academician supporting her, she might have fainted from overwhelming happiness.

Sang Sang continued to stare at the tip of her shoes, silent for a moment, then softly said, "When I was little, I heard... him explain the Tang Law: before marriage, parents have the responsibility to raise their children. That day, you two told me to move to the Grand Academician's Estate. If it is to fulfill that responsibility according to Tang Law, then may I move in here?"

"Of course you may." Madam Zeng Jing joyfully grasped her hand: "This is your home, you naturally can come back to live here."

Grand Academician Zeng Jing looked at the thin, dark little girl before him, happy but also puzzled. Recalling how he and his wife had humbled themselves to beg her to return to their shop that day, yet she resolutely refused, saying she wanted to stay by her young master's side. As a Grand Academician of the current dynasty, he was well aware of Ning Que's movements since his return to Chang'an, wondering what had happened to make her change her mind.

After all, he was a Grand Academician, and an elder who valued patriarchal dignity. Zeng Jing had already acknowledged Sang Sang as his daughter, so he directly asked his question.

Sang Sang looked up, facing the couple before her, and seriously said, "Now I no longer like him, so I don't want to stay with him."

Zeng Jing frowned slightly, recalling the Empress's reminder not to sever ties, pondered for a moment, then said, "After all, you two have been together for many years. Not to mention the master-servant relationship, you also have a past of relying on each other. If you want to move back here, you should inform Ning Que first."

Sang Sang glanced at him, then suddenly turned to walk out of the estate. Madam Zeng Jing was terrified, quickly holding her back, and asked in a trembling voice, "What is it now?"

Sang Sang silently looked at the Grand Academician, not saying a word. Madam Zeng Jing was utterly panicked, glaring sharply at the Grand Academician, and angrily scolded, "If you can't say anything nice, don't speak nonsense! If you make my poor child disappear again, watch out, I won't let you off!"

The Grand Academician's Estate traditionally placed Madam first, so even though Zeng Jing did not believe he had spoken wrongly, and felt annoyed that Sang Sang ignored her father, under his wife's murderous gaze, he had no choice but to shut his mouth.

Sang Sang looked at Madam Zeng Jing and said, "I'll stay with you, I won't stay with him."

Madam Zeng Jing was overjoyed: "Everything as you wish, I will immediately send someone to move your father's belongings to the study."

...

Ning Que woke up and didn't see Sang Sang. He put on his coat, went to the courtyard well and called out, but there was no reply. He stretched and went into the kitchen, saw that Sang Sang hadn't lit the fire or boiled water, and shook his head in resignation. Going to the front shop, he saw a bowl of sour and spicy noodles on the table.

"Eating breakfast without brushing your teeth?" He frowned at the bowl of noodles. For years, he had been accustomed to a small pair of hands bringing water and toiletries to him every morning. Suddenly, without anyone to serve him, he felt unaccustomed.

"Even if you were in a hurry to buy the freshest bowl of noodles, you should have served me after I washed my face and brushed my teeth. Oh, no, the noodles have already been bought, where did this little girl run off to?"

Ning Que ate his noodles while wondering where Sang Sang had gone, finally guessing that her stinginess had resurfaced, and she must have run to the South Gate market to buy fresh vegetables carried up by farmers from the countryside.

"Only two or three copper coins cheaper, is it worth getting up early and running so far?"

After eating, Ning Que, while mocking someone, carried the dirty bowl to the backyard and casually tossed it next to the stove. Feeling still sleepy, he went back to sleep for another nap.

When the sky was fully bright, he woke up again, rubbed his eyes, put on his shoes, and left his room. Seeing the shop and backyard still silent, he irritably shouted, "Where's the hot water? Am I going out like this?"

There was no reply; the Old Brush Shop was as quiet as a tomb. Ning Que was stunned. He went into the kitchen to check and saw the dirty bowl still there, the stove cold, no firewood, no fire, and naturally no hot water.

He walked to the corner of the courtyard well, looked at the neatly stacked small pile of firewood, and sighed. He hugged some into the kitchen and began to light a fire to boil water. Although he hadn't done housework for many years, he used to be the one who managed their lives, so this wasn't difficult. Soon, steam rose from the water.

Looking at the steam, Ning Que suddenly felt something was amiss. The water was hot, he washed his face, and then, for some reason, he also washed the dirty bowl.

If it were a normal day, he would have gone to the Academy or strolled around Chang'an, but today he went nowhere. Instead, he silently went to the front shop, sat in the grand armchair, looked at the gleaming tables, chairs, and furniture, looked at the floor clean of a single speck of dust, then fell into a daze.

He sat there for a very long time, his face stiff. Occasionally, someone would pass by the alley, their shadow cast on the shop door making him look up, but no one ever pushed the door open and entered.

No one returned.

Ning Que waited silently until nearly noon, then suddenly stood up and pushed the door open, walking out. He went to Bian Yi Fang in East City to buy a roasted duck, then to the market for some green vegetables, and returned to the Old Brush Shop.

There was still no sign of Sang Sang in the shop. Ning Que silently went into the kitchen, picked up a spatula, stir-fried two vegetable dishes, cooked a pot of rice, neatly arranged the roasted duck meat on a plate, and carried them to the table.

Two pairs of chopsticks, two bowls of hot white rice, a sumptuous meal. Ning Que looked at the dining table with satisfaction, rested his hands on his knees, and continued to wait. However, he waited a very long time, but no one returned to eat. There were still two pairs of chopsticks, but only one person; the rice and dishes had grown cold.

Ning Que stared at the meal for a long time, then picked up his chopsticks and began to eat. But for some reason, his hands trembled, and he couldn't pick up a single vegetable. He wanted to throw the chopsticks away but restrained himself, slowly placing them back on the table.

He abruptly stood up, returned to his bedroom, roughly flipped open the bed board, took out the box, and emptied everything inside onto the bed. Looking at the scattered silver notes, he finally confirmed that she had left on her own.

Ning Que expressionlessly stacked the silver notes and tucked them into his bosom. He took out the Original Thirteen Arrows, which he had just repaired the day before yesterday, from his storage box, tucked all the talismans into his sleeves, fastened the firewood-chopping knife to his belt, and finally slung the Big Black Umbrella onto his back before walking out of the Old Brush Shop.

He knew Sang Sang was not in danger, but he clearly understood that this would be the most difficult battle of his life. So he brought all the most important things, as if only by doing so could he reassure himself that he would definitely find the most important thing in his life.

If he couldn't find it, he wouldn't need to return either.