He Wanted to Step Out of It

Xie Qizhi felt extremely guilty. Clutching his pillow, he didn't dare to make a sound, shuffling forward step by step, staring intently at the shiny seashell button on his older brother's pajamas. He tilted his head, wanting to lean against his brother to act spoiled, but Xie Zhilan reached out and pushed him away.

"Cut it out." His gaze landed on Xie Qizhi's feigned calm face. With a half-smile, he said, "You've gotten quite used to acting spoiled, haven't you? Is that how you begged him to take you out?"

"No, it wasn't. Brother Ying Huai coaxed me into going."

Confessing without even being pressed. Xie Zhilan suppressed the curl of his lips and patted Xie Qizhi's head. "Coaxed you? You actually have the nerve to say that."

"It's true." Using a puppy to lure him, how was that not coaxing?

Xie Qizhi closed the door, threw himself into Xie Zhilan's arms, and looked up, calling out, "Brother."

Xie Zhilan looked down and asked, "What is it?"

"Did you look for me?"

"So you actually knew I would look for you." Xie Zhilan pinched his cheek. "The moment I stepped away, both you and your backpack vanished. You've gotten quite bold, haven't you?"

He didn't let go, so Xie Qizhi mumbled, "I thought Brother Ying Huai had already told you."

He had indeed, but the messages Xie Zhilan sent asking him to bring Xie Qizhi home early had been completely ignored by Ying Huai. Xie Zhilan rubbed his slightly reddened cheek, looking at him with near-gentleness. "Qiqi, did you know he even hung up on several of my calls?"

That guy dared to hang up on his brother... Xie Qizhi blinked, hearing his brother speak again: "If this was your idea, get ready for a beating."

Xie Qizhi was startled, looking straight into his brother's slightly curved eyes. That wasn't a teasing smile—he meant it!

If he got beaten, Ying Huai wasn't getting off scot-free either! Hanging up the phone meant he had to bear at least half the responsibility!

Xie Qizhi shook his head. He didn't even know when his brother had called, so how could he be blamed? He looked at his brother with innocent eyes, saying with utter sincerity, "I didn't dare. I didn't see him get any calls."

"True, his phone was on silent." Xie Zhilan let him go and turned around, murmuring, "You aren't even as tall as his elbow, how could you have seen his phone?"

Xie Qizhi chased after him, crying out in protest, "Brother!"

It was close to midnight, already very late. Xie Qizhi got into bed, placing his pillow right next to his brother's, and slid under the covers, lying straight. Xie Zhilan stood by the bed, looking at him thoughtfully for a moment, then suddenly said, "Roll over."

Xie Qizhi obediently rolled over to lie on his stomach, resting his head on the pillow. "What for?"

Xie Zhilan didn't answer. Kneeling half on the bed, he gave him a smack through the blanket.

With a dull thwack, Xie Qizhi turned his head in shock, crawling up to ask, "Why did you hit me? I already said it wasn't my idea."

"I believe you."

"Then why did you still hit me!"

"The more I think about it, the angrier I get," Xie Zhilan said as if it were only natural. "If I don't give you a beating, I won't be able to sleep tonight."

Xie Qizhi sat on the edge of the bed, staring at him resentfully for a moment before crawling back under the covers, curling up into a pitiful ball.

In his daze, he heard his brother answer a phone call, seemingly from their father.

Xie Qizhi was half-awake, seeing his brother sitting at the head of the bed. The nightlight illuminated his face, casting a soft shadow over his eyelashes.

His brother held the phone and asked, "Three hundred million?"

Xie Qizhi rubbed his eyes, faintly hearing his father's voice through the phone: "The transaction price is three hundred million, sold to a Singaporean."

He was still too young to understand the topic they were discussing, nor did he comprehend the implications of the shipping market downturn, shipowners abandoning vessels causing massive losses, and various factors like fundraising difficulties leading to divestment. It was only much later that he understood this phone call had stemmed from that matter.

Ying Huai's father had taken over the group less than five years ago, yet he had already classified his grandfather's startup shipyard as a bad asset and sold it to another company.

His father made a brief comment about Ying Huai's father, calling him short-sighted, conceited, and too obsessed with gains and losses. Then his father brought up Ying Huai, but Xie Qizhi couldn't hear clearly what they said.

He was too sleepy, curling up in his brother's arms. His brother habitually supported him, patting his back gently, and he closed his eyes, falling fast asleep.

The next morning, Xie Qizhi sat on the edge of the bed. His knees and thighs felt sore and slightly painful. Perhaps it was from walking too much yesterday, or maybe from skateboarding.

His brother tapped his forehead, asking if he was still half-asleep.

Xie Qizhi didn't dare tell his brother. He simply leaned against him, rubbing his face on his T-shirt, before carrying his pillow back to his own room.

Just as he reached his door, the floor suddenly shook. He had to grab the doorknob to steady himself. A heavy tightness gripped his chest, as if something invisible was blocking his airway. He opened his eyes to see his pillow fallen on the floor, but when he reached out, he couldn't touch it.

His fingertips trembled, and sweat beaded on his forehead. Xie Qizhi clutched his chest, unable to suppress his ragged gasps and violent coughing. At this moment, he once again felt the long-absent suffocation, like Death returning to wrap its arms tightly around him.

He took his medicine before his brother and the maid could notice, cleaning up everything himself. Before changing into his uniform, he looked up at the rabbit balloon floating against the ceiling. It emitted a faint glow, no longer as bright as last night.

Xie Qizhi's mental state wasn't very good. He propped his chin up listlessly, losing his appetite before finishing even half of his breakfast. He kept his eyes closed the entire ride in the car. Xie Zhilan was somewhat worried, asking if he felt unwell. Xie Qizhi opened his eyes and shook his head. Xie Zhilan asked again, "Are you very sleepy?" He paused for a few seconds, then nodded.

Xie Zhilan raised his hand to cover his eyes. He could feel the warm body temperature and a ticklish sensation as the boy's eyelashes brushed against his palm. He told Xie Qizhi, "Sleep for a bit. I won't disturb you."

According to Wu Xiaolong's observations, Lan-ge's mood this morning was inexplicably terrible. The moment they arrived in class, Ying Huai provoked him simply by stepping in with his left foot first, resulting in Lan-ge blocking him in the hallway and giving him a beating. Coincidentally, the head of the grade walked past, and both of them were thoroughly scolded and punished to stand outside the classroom during morning self-study. Countless acquaintances made excuses to fetch water or use the restroom just to watch and laugh at them.

However, sharing hardships did not dissolve the conflict between Xie Zhilan and Ying Huai.

After school in the afternoon, Ying Huai rarely didn't leave early. He stayed in the classroom, waiting for the white-haired kid Xie Qizhi to appear, then turned his head to ask him, "The sports meet tomorrow, do you want to run?"

Before Xie Qizhi could blink and answer, Xie Zhilan slammed a thick book onto Ying Huai's desk with a loud thud. He told Ying Huai, "Shut up."

Ying Huai looked up, asking seriously, "Did you take the wrong medicine?"

Xie Zhilan looked at him coldly. "Try saying one more word."

Wu Xiaolong immediately got a headache, fearing these two young masters would fight right in front of him, and he wouldn't even know whose side to take.

This near-explosion was defused when Xie Qizhi walked over, taking his brother's palm and shaking it, saying softly, "Brother, don't fight."

Xie Zhilan pursed his lips, looking down at Xie Qizhi's soft crown, and said nothing more.

Xie Qizhi turned around, looking at Ying Huai hesitantly. "What if I run? And what if I don't?"

Ying Huai leaned over to look at him, his elbow resting on the back of the chair, saying casually, "If you want to run, then train and prepare well. Don't get hurt."

He had pure black eyes, like a still, rippleless pond deep in the forest, carrying a decisiveness and determination that wouldn't waver for anyone or anything.

Was it because he didn't fully understand his illness? Xie Qizhi thought to himself. That was why, in Ying Huai's eyes, he wasn't a patient who couldn't live past eighteen. Instead, it was a belief that human will could overcome objective conditions—it was only a matter of whether he wanted to, not whether he could.

He thought for a long time, finally replying, "I want to."

Xie Zhilan immediately interrupted, "I don't agree."

They were at a standoff once again. Xie Qizhi actually knew very well, especially after that brief episode early this morning, who between Ying Huai and his brother represented the more rational and correct choice, the closest path to survival.

His brother could give tens or hundreds of reasons not to do it, while Ying Huai didn't have a single one.

Ying Huai had no intention of persuading anyone in the first place. He merely asked a question and gave a piece of advice; whether he wanted to or not was entirely up to Xie Qizhi.

But Xie Qizhi was easily persuaded. He wanted to deviate from the safe path and follow his original choice. He didn't want to be trapped in a weak, sickly body, becoming a fragile person cowering under his brother's wings.

He wanted to step out of it, and the first step was to resist his brother's protection.