Ti Ying on the Snow (Part 3)

"So, why won't you admit that you are my biological brother?"

The green water rippled, and the sunset glow descended. Clumps of reeds, half a person tall, swayed in the wind. Two children, one older and one younger, walked through the reed marsh, their shadows stretched endlessly under the brilliant golden light.

Jiang Xuehe walked in front. Ti Ying followed closely behind. She had been pestering him like this for many days. He, however, would not budge, refusing to accept her phrasing or admit to being her biological brother. She couldn't force the "biological brother" status on him. After asking until she was frustrated, like right now, Jiang Xuehe narrowed his eyes and looked up at the setting sun, saying nonchalantly:

"You can consider me your brother, but I am not your brother."

Six-year-old Ti Ying was confused by this statement. She didn't understand the difference between those two meanings. She only hoped for a closer relationship, one that couldn't be separated for any reason, hoping she wouldn't be all alone...

But she truly couldn't see through Jiang Xuehe. He seemed like someone who was contemptuous of everything, caring for nothing. He had a cold, indifferent side, yet he was exceptionally good to her. His personality seemed to be able to expand and contract at will; he could pretend as he pleased, becoming a different person for different people. Ti Ying always remembered his connection to blood and killing, always feeling uneasy because of the fluctuating distance between them. He was too mysterious...

While Ti Ying was lost in thought, she saw the youth in front suddenly stop, standing still for a moment. She curiously caught up. "What's wrong..."

He was staring blankly. Only when the sound of her footsteps reached him from behind did he snap out of it. He reached out to cover her eyes. "Don't look..."

But through the gaps in his fingers, Ti Ying had already seen. Outside the reed marsh lay several corpses. The world was in turmoil, and evil spirits were rampant. Several bodies lay by the road, their chests torn open by claws, internal organs scattered, and blood staining the ground—a terrifying sight.

Jiang Xuehe thought that Ti Ying, being so young, would scream in terror at such a sight. He covered her eyes, and she leaned against his leg, but she only trembled for a long time before whispering, "Are... are they dead?"

Jiang Xuehe glanced at them and gave a soft "Hmm."

Ti Ying was dazed for a moment, then asked unwillingly, "Can't they be saved?"

Jiang Xuehe looked again and confirmed it. He felt the small body leaning against him trembling slightly. He himself didn't have much emotion toward death. When he was Shen Er, he wasn't a living person to begin with, and Ti Ying hadn't been afraid of him then. Now, in his identity as Ye Sha, he vaguely thought children should fear these things and shouldn't be exposed to them so early. He knelt down to comfort Ti Ying, only to see the little girl beneath his palm turn pale, her lips bloodless, as she whispered, "I... I see them floating in the air..."

Jiang Xuehe was stunned. He turned to look at the corpses. He suspected Ti Ying was seeing ghosts, but she was so young; if she could see them, the ghosts would have to have manifested a physical form. Jiang Xuehe looked for a long time but saw no ghosts manifesting. This proved... Ti Ying was naturally close to ghosts; her naked eyes could see things others couldn't.

He then thought of Ti Ying's words, "Ghost Matriarch said they were dead," but her voice held no sadness... She was young and didn't yet understand life and death. Because she saw ghosts, she couldn't distinguish the gap between "living" and "dead."

While Jiang Xuehe was deep in thought, he heard Ti Ying ask softly, "Brother, do you know how to appease the dead? You know... help them dissipate their resentment and send them to rebirth?"

Jiang Xuehe thought for a moment and said, "I'll give it a try."

The Duansheng Path didn't teach such spells. When he was Shen Er, he didn't have the good heart to help people appease souls either. But as Jiang Xuehe, he wanted Ti Ying to have a more complete memory, so he found a way to learn. He took Ti Ying to stay at a temple for the night, learning the art of soul appeasement from a monk. At night, he and Ti Ying returned to the corpses. With Ti Ying's help in identifying the ghosts, he drew a soul-appeasing formation and sent the ghosts to rebirth.

He carried her back to rest. The little girl's breath brushed against his neck. He heard Ti Ying say in a childish voice, "Thank you, Brother."

Jiang Xuehe said gently, "It's nothing; it's what I should do." He paused for a moment, as if wanting to compensate. "Overall, I am a good person who likes to help others."

A six-year-old naturally didn't understand the point he was trying to emphasize. Ti Ying hugged his neck, her eyes open as she leaned on his back. After a while, she said dreamily, "I still don't understand life and death. I clearly see many people 'living,' but everyone says they are dead. I see those 'living' people not speaking or laughing, but they truly exist... I can't tell the difference. If existence and death are both so simple, why are people so sad?"

Jiang Xuehe couldn't answer. Ti Ying asked, "Brother, do you care about the death of humans?"

She held her breath, waiting for an answer, but Jiang Xuehe said nothing. Neither the experience of Shen Er nor the life of Ye Sha in the Duansheng Path could give him an answer. Perhaps Jiang Xuehe truly could... but he knew he was only aiming toward the real Jiang Xuehe right now, not yet having become that person.

Sometimes at night, he dreamed of his former self. But the Jiang Xuehe in his dreams sat cross-legged by a still body of water, mist swirling around, with no exit, and his face unclear. The Jiang Xuehe in the dream looked at him, without sorrow or joy. Memory was like a wall, blocking all karma and hiding all traces. Was he doing the right thing now? He himself had no answer.

Ti Ying didn't get an answer about life and death, only hearing the youth's low voice: "You should sleep now."

Ti Ying stared blankly at his refined profile. Jiang Xuehe said, "I'll tell you a story to help you sleep."

He told that story again. Thick stars, the red dust like a tapestry. The heavenly river was like a silver vase being overturned, pouring down a silver jade pool. They walked through this vast world, depending on each other. Jiang Xuehe repeated and detailed that story. In his story, there were villains and bad monsters, and the Senior Brother and Junior Sister wanted to flee...

Ti Ying grew sleepy listening. She yawned, closed her eyes, and asked, "What happened next?"

Jiang Xuehe: "What happened next... I'll tell you next time."

The little girl on his back was silent for a long time, her breath steady. Jiang Xuehe thought she was asleep, but she suddenly spoke: "Next, let the Junior Sister put in some effort too."

Jiang Xuehe: "Hmm?"

Ti Ying: "In the same story, how can the Senior Brother always be the one finding ways to take the Junior Sister and flee, while the Junior Sister knows nothing? Your story isn't good; the Junior Sister should also work hard."

Jiang Xuehe's gaze softened as he asked her, "How does the Junior Sister want to work hard?"

The little girl on his back was indeed very sleepy; she frowned, her mind muddled. Just as she was about to be woken up by his question, she heard Jiang Xuehe chuckle softly: "Then next time, you compose the story yourself."

Ti Ying grew excited. "Okay, okay."

Jiang Xuehe then suggested teaching Ti Ying spells. Ti Ying dreamily let him coax her into learning. She hadn't wanted to learn, but this brother had a face that was both gentle and sharp, spoke softly, and radiated a cold aura when silent that made people afraid. He always carried a heavy heart; even when with her, she felt he had an unfulfilled wish that she couldn't see through. She hoped he would be happier, so she did as he said, stepping into the gate of Daoist cultivation.

He guided her. Jiang Xuehe himself was vague, knowing one part but not ten. Fortunately, Ti Ying was obedient and didn't ask too many questions he didn't understand. But whenever she was confused, he would remember it, waiting until he returned to the Duansheng Path to discuss and debate with Li Bu.

This time, Jiang Xuehe and Ti Ying stayed together for half a month before Ti Ying was summoned back by the Ghost Matriarch. Ti Ying carefully made an appointment for their next meeting with the little brother before returning to the Ghost Matriarch's side. Thanks to this friend of her age, she felt much more comfortable.

The Ghost Matriarch possessed a stone statue. The mountain cave at night was heavy with yin energy, with no lamps or fire, and no hint of human presence, only a hazy demonic aura surrounding Ti Ying, seeping into her bones. Ti Ying curled her body, her teeth chattering from the cold. She comforted herself, thinking that the next time the Ghost Matriarch went out would be fine... she could meet the little brother again, and have another friend...

The hazy voice of the Ghost Matriarch rang in her head: "You have the scent of another living person on you..."

Ti Ying's face turned pale. The Ghost Matriarch sniffed her gently and asked, "Have you made a friend?"

Ti Ying's mind went blank, and she said, "Don't... don't kill him..."

The Ghost Matriarch was like a stone statue with no feelings, yet she tried to act gentle and maternal. Her breath drifted through the cave, the two contrasting natures making her even more eerie. "Don't you fail to distinguish between the living and the dead? Xiao Ying, life and death have no meaning to you."

Her hand stroked the little girl's face, carrying a sigh. "You are mine; you belong only to me..."

Ti Ying trembled and closed her eyes. "I... I belong only to you... Don't harm my friend..."

"Friend?" The term made the Ghost Matriarch sneer. But her voice suddenly paused, slowly penetrating the little girl's spiritual veins. "You... have opened your spiritual veins and sea of consciousness, and you have spiritual energy..."

Ti Ying looked up, gathering all her courage. "This... this was all taught by my friend. My spiritual energy is greater now; I can offer it to you better... My friend taught me many other things too." She teared up, her voice trembling, her small body curled in the corner, but she repeated over and over, "My spiritual energy is all for you, all yours... The more I learn, the more I give you!"

The Ghost Matriarch chuckled. Her laughter filled the place, bringing waves of yin wind. Ti Ying's eyes widened, seeing nothing in the pitch darkness. But the Ghost Matriarch said no more. Ti Ying thought that the Ghost Matriarch had tacitly agreed to her making a friend. Joy rose in her heart, and she hurriedly wiped her tears, thinking it was wonderful. Though her parents were gone, and the uncles in the village were gone, and many people were dead, the little brother would be her friend. The Ghost Matriarch wouldn't kill the little brother! As long as she became stronger and offered more spiritual energy to the Ghost Matriarch, she could protect Jiang Xuehe. She could have a brother.

When Jiang Xuehe met Ti Ying again, he found the spiritual energy in her body had vanished again. He frowned as he checked her body, his gaze suddenly becoming sharp. Ti Ying vaguely felt his gaze was very cold, as if he had realized something. She forced a smile and lied, "When I practiced the spells you taught me, I used up all my spiritual energy because I practiced too much. This proves I am very diligent." She smiled at him, trying to please him.

Jiang Xuehe lowered his eyes, saying nothing, only pulling her into his arms and applying ointment to her arm. Ti Ying was dazed, not knowing if she had fooled him. But he truly didn't ask further, making her heart very uneasy. His fingers were cold as they touched her arm. She looked down, and her eyes suddenly filled with tears, a surge of grievance rising. A tear fell onto his fingertip. She saw his finger pause. Her heart hung by a thread, fearing he would ask. But he only paused for a moment and continued applying the ointment as if nothing had happened.

Ti Ying thought she had hidden it. She tried to blink away her tears. Just then, she heard Jiang Xuehe speak: "Xiao Ying, have you truly never thought about leaving with me?"

Ti Ying was startled. He lowered his eyes, calm and steady. "You cannot follow a monster for your whole life."

Ti Ying whispered, "I can't."

Jiang Xuehe: "Why? What are your concerns?"

Ti Ying: "I am a little shamaness; the people sacrificed me to the Ghost Matriarch, so I should do what I need to do. As long as I am with the Ghost Matriarch, she won't bully my parents, won't bully the villagers, and won't bully the surrounding towns... As long as I follow the Ghost Matriarch, everyone will be happy." She looked up, filled with expectation, feeling like a hero doing something great. "I want everyone to be happy!"

Jiang Xuehe looked at her for a moment and asked, "So you plan to never leave for your whole life?" He pressed, "What if one day the Ghost Matriarch doesn't like you anymore, doesn't want you anymore, will you still not leave? If abandoned by the Ghost Matriarch, what will you do?"

She was stunned, her face showing unease. She heard Jiang Xuehe say, "You feel satisfied being with her, but would you not be happy being with me? Your Moon-Swallowing Village sacrifices a shamaness or shaman every five years. When the five-year term is up and the next shamaness or shaman comes to take your place, will you still insist on not leaving?"

Ti Ying blurted out, "How could that be! The Ghost Matriarch likes me very much; she won't want anyone else..."

Jiang Xuehe lowered his eyes, asking calmly, "Are you sure this is liking?" He raised an eyebrow slightly, his eyes like ice and snow seeing through her. "Liking you yet ignoring you? She only likes your spiritual energy... When your spiritual energy is completely devoured and your spiritual pool is dry, you will be abandoned in five years."

Ti Ying: "No!" She was incredibly firm. "She likes me very much; our village doesn't need to send a new shamaness or shaman to her. I alone am enough! My spiritual energy never runs out! As long as I use it correctly and always provide spiritual energy to the Ghost Matriarch, she will always like me... Other people's spiritual energy isn't as much as mine. I won't be abandoned!"

Jiang Xuehe looked at her calmly, then suddenly smiled. He leaned in, lightly pinching her chin, and said softly, "Actually, you understand everything, don't you? You want to sacrifice yourself to save everyone... Are others willing? Is the Ghost Matriarch willing? And you... are you truly willing?" He asked, "Do you truly not want to follow me?"

Ti Ying: "Why should I follow you? You're not exactly a good person yourself..." She suddenly realized she had misspoken, seeing him lower his lashes and glance at her. Her face turned pale.

Jiang Xuehe said, "I can be a good person... as long as you are willing."

What did that mean? Ti Ying stared at him blankly; she truly didn't understand. When it was time to sleep, he began telling that story again as if trying to brainwash her. She grew tired of listening and tried to clumsily change an idea for the story... The two talked and fell asleep together. She still asked about the story's progress, and he still deceived her as before:

"What happened next? Did they finally escape?"

"What happens next... I'll tell you tomorrow."

At night, Ti Ying was jolted awake by a nightmare, finding the little brother who usually held her wasn't in the room. She sat hugging her blanket for a moment, hearing movement outside. She tiptoed out of bed and groggily went to the door. She was in a half-awake state until she pulled the door open—

*Splat—* Blood sprayed onto her face. A person with a ferocious expression fell toward her, carrying a resentment that wouldn't let them die in peace: "Ye Sha..."

Jiang Xuehe turned his head. The courtyard was full of corpses, and one body was lunging toward Ti Ying, who had just opened the door. Jiang Xuehe rushed to intervene, pushing the body away, but he couldn't stop a spray of blood from hitting Ti Ying's face. The little girl's white face was stained with several streaks of blood, and even her lashes were dyed red.

Ti Ying was dazed. She heard a mocking laugh. A stranger laughed and said, "Ye Sha, is this your 'hidden golden house'? You're so young; are you raising a child bride?"

She heard Jiang Xuehe's cold voice: "Shut up."

Ti Ying's mind went blank as she groggily looked up into Jiang Xuehe's eyes. His pupils were still and dark, his indifference toward life and death not yet fully retracted. He intentionally tried to show some warmth, but that warmth didn't reach his eyes. She could only look at him through the gaps in his fingers. The fingers covering her eyes were also incredibly cold. Though he withdrew his hand quickly, Ti Ying still saw the sharp blue light he had just held in his hand. She remembered Jiang Xuehe once taught her he belonged to the Wood element, and his spells were light blue. She always saw him as gentle, using spells to mold all sorts of interesting things to coax her, but he also used those means to kill.

The ground was covered in corpses. He was becoming more and more adept at killing. While Ti Ying was in a daze, she heard Jiang Xuehe's intentionally gentle voice: "Xiao Ying, go back into the room, okay?"

She didn't cry or make a fuss, only whispering "Hmm" before turning back into the room. She heard the stranger behind her laugh again: "Your child bride is so good, so obedient... Ng!" The person went silent in agony; Jiang Xuehe must have used some method.

Ti Ying thought: *What is a child bride?* And then: *Brother is truly a bad person, isn't he?*

Jiang Xuehe finished handling the messy business and went inside to check on Ti Ying. He felt a bit of regret. He should have used a spell to make her sleep deeply so she wouldn't hear the movement outside. But he rejected using such means on her, which led to her witnessing him killing tonight. Jiang Xuehe felt indifferent toward everything in the Duansheng Path. First, he had no concept of good and evil; second, this was just a memory of Ti Ying's. All he wanted to hide was his bad side. Unfortunately, she saw it anyway.

Jiang Xuehe took a deep breath and pushed the door open. He saw the little girl sitting on the bed, swinging her white feet, her hair loose. She was seven years old. She looked lost, groggily looking up at him. In her dark eyes, he saw his own unyielding nature. He was still for a moment before walking over to sit beside her. He noticed that as he approached, she flinched slightly, her body stiffening for a moment, her gaze toward him carrying a bit of fear.

Jiang Xuehe lowered his eyes and said, "...Tonight was an accident."

Ti Ying asked naively, "Are you saying the killing was an accident, or that killing right in front of me was an accident?"

He didn't answer. After a while, he felt her hand tug at his sleeve, giving it a little pull. Ti Ying said, "Brother, you're a bad person, aren't you? The Ghost Matriarch is an evil monster, and you're a bad person too, aren't you?"

Jiang Xuehe's chest tightened. His lashes trembled. A very subtle and mysterious feeling arose in his heart. He slowly asked, "Do you hope... I am a good person?"

That night, Ti Ying didn't give him an answer. Perhaps she herself didn't know. She was just unhappy, and her mood was poor in the following days they spent together. Jiang Xuehe took her back to the Ghost Matriarch and returned to the Duansheng Path himself. He thought about the subtle feeling when facing Ti Ying, a hint of alarm—did the true memory correspond to what was happening now?

He was originally the Void Filth, so killing those the Duansheng Path ordered him to was done without hesitation. Ye Sha was raised by the Duansheng Path since childhood, and he also had no sense of good or evil, not seeing anything wrong with what he did. But Ti Ying's expression was very fearful... In this memory, it seemed Jiang Xuehe wanted the story to be more complete, but everything subtly corresponded to what had once happened that he had forgotten. His name was given by her... His good and evil were molded by her... His future... Was it because of Ti Ying that he left the Duansheng Path to become Senior Brother and Junior Sister with her? In the long time before he died, had he and she depended on each other and supported each other? He entered the memory illusion wanting to take Ti Ying away, to escape the Ghost Matriarch's curse and leave the secret realm; so in this memory, in the story that once happened, did Ye Sha also want to take Ti Ying away from the Ghost Matriarch's control? In the destined arrangement, did he fit the story's progression? Then... could he truly succeed in taking Ti Ying away?

A month later, Jiang Xuehe met Ti Ying again. Regarding their previous unhappiness, Jiang Xuehe needed an explanation. He had thought of many excuses; he wanted to say his current cultivation was still low, so he couldn't leave the Duansheng Path yet, but when he became more powerful, he would leave; as for the sins of an assassin, he would reconsider them...

Before he could speak, Ti Ying stood before him, looking up and asking, "Does what you said before still count?"

Jiang Xuehe was stunned. She seemed to have made a very big decision. She looked a bit haggard and sad, her small face having no flesh on it. Ti Ying looked at him. "If... I leave the Ghost Matriarch, are you willing to leave the Duansheng Path and go with me?"

His mind was struck like by lightning, a brilliant flash illuminating everything. Jiang Xuehe's eyes sparkled, his lashes trembling. In that brief moment of alarm, he looked up at her in a daze. The little girl's face was pale, her lips trembling. She had also tortured herself over this decision, struggling for a long time. The breeze was slow, and her voice was light and soft as she endured all her fear of the Ghost Matriarch, fear of the future, and her own expectation, betraying herself to choose him:

"Can we leave together? Can we hide our names? Can we go and find a powerful Master for protection? Can we be Senior Brother and Junior Sister? Let's run away together, Brother... Brother Xiao He."